Thursday, October 1, 2009

The First Day of the Rest of My Life


The skys turn so dull grey, the wind picks up swiftly, almost as a warning of what is to come. Yet i stand here with my face to the sky ready for it. The thunder rolls softly almost a whisper, then quickly turning to a solid roar in the sky. The leaves have started to turn, reminding me of the promise i've made to myself on the first day of Autumn. Suddenly the rain begins to fall..........

At first, it's small drops, cooler than summer rain, bigger, almost like the tears Alice cries in Wonderland. They pick up more intense now, faster, heavier and soon you smell it....... the first rain of Fall. It is such an earthy smell, as if you can tell the season change through the scent, and you can. Looking around me the leaves have started changing, it's no longer just the dried crisp tips of the leaves, the color has begun to smother the leave almost to the point you dont see the green on any of them anymore, yet the true vibrant color of the season has not peaked.

I close my eyes, face to the clouds, wetness falling so softly on my lips causing me to smile. It's here- a new season, a new chapter, the rest of my life!

It is amazing to me, the things we can endure in a month that can change our lives forever. The people we meet, the friends we make... even the friends we've had who had to push us down the hill and slap us- only with love to make sure we realize we've lost ourselves in the season. The past is the past, just that... once you leave it, that is where it stays. Or it should anyways.

Memories deleted from computers or torn from pages still remain in our minds, not by choice. It's up to us to pick and chose the memories we wish to imprint us and our souls forever. The changes made in me have been for the better. I've come into this season with a fresh new perspective on life and finally found my light again... there in the eyes once grown cold for whatever reason.

I sit here with all my windows open, as always, the rain spraying into my face as i type and the scent of earth swirling around my head making me giddy inside- butterflies like a first kiss, a spring morning, or a babys laugh.

Life is wonderful, as much as you can find in a day that says otherwise, at the end of it, like today, the importance lies in the present- there is so much here to be thankful for. Not run from the rain because we dont want our hair messed up, but stand in it, feel it, smell it and smile because you're alive and that is all you can ask and move forward- smiling, maybe even skipping at a quicker pace than yesterday.

So in the end - of the day - the season - the relationship - the year - the moment.... look back and smile, watch the bad melt away like the rain washes the dirt from the concrete.... into the gutter never to be seen again. Felt- maybe, if you let it, but seen... only in your minds eye if you wish.

I hope today was filled with nothing but good memories, butterflies in your stomach, falls first true storm, children laughing, puppies yapping, whatever it is that makes you smile and gives you a sense of comfort in your life. I know i have mine back- here where it always was, just covered by the end of a seasons dust from staying in one place for way too long emotionally.

Cheers my friends- May your evening be filled with everything that makes your heart smile, and your chest burst with laughter.

2 comments:

Miss Caught Up said...

That was absolutely lovely :) Thank you for the post.

Chuck Dilmore said...

always
you are
a beautiful light
in our world, Bambi.