So... I know, I know... you are totally picturing a house built out of sticks and spit at this point... I promise it's not... My house is just SO surrounded by wildlife that ... well they are now wanting to move in. This surprises me... I mean I feed the blind Opossum across the street for a reason, it's kept him from trying to move in! Gees!
Has anyone seen "A Haunting in Connecticut"? Try to sit through that one without jumping out of your seat, spililling over buttered popcorn on your new white (what a stupid choice of color for me huh?) sweatshirt, or crying during this film. I tell you what... I didn't cry! I liked the movie though, and if you like supernatural thrillers (whether it really is based on a true story or NOT) you should check it out. I dont squirm during movies- This movie made me want to crawl into my shoes with one eye shut (at times) and it had a happy ending... WTF- how, explain to me, HOW does a movie like this end happy? Well it does... so i may have just ruined it for you... oopsy!
Last question for today- Why are there 29 followers to my site, and hundreds of the same IP addresses that visit every day? Come ON people.... follow publicly already, it's like you're that creeperton in the shadows of the dark alley... but you're just admiring my shoes... come out of hiding already!
And a little excerpt from one of my BFF's Jenni- You all know her as Bettie Page (look alike) This is a description of the 'Female Wonders' to a gay friend of ours who would like to be a woman... Well, grow some ovaries and retain water like a son of a bitch for starters. As you get older the bigger your friggin ovaries swell and you begin to fear you are pregnant, even if you don't think it is possible. Some days are bad enough that even when you ovulate you bend over double and walk like the hunchback of Notre Dame because standing fully upright stretches out your already stressed out skin over your ginormous fucking belly.
After your eggache goes away, then you have 2 weeks of uncertainty where you feel you may burst into tears because you are afraid a friend/coworker/boyfriend/family member is pissed at you. They really aren't, you are just being paranoid.
Here are the things I think will help you get to this level of body function and emotional intensity: Eat so much cheese and drink nothing but caffienated beverages for weeks on end so that your stomach bloats up so bad and you are so constipated you look and feel pregnant.
Smoke pot and drop acid at the same time to get the paranoia and mood swings required. Do I have it about right, Bambi?
Amen My Friend- Or Sadhu :) have a superfabulous day everyone!